I was just reading through "Self-Reliance" for about the hundredth time and paused on this sequence:
It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.
If we can forgive the sexist language (I'm sure you noticed how Emerson associates brave nonconformity with masculinity and mindless conformity with femininity), perhaps we can take a minute to appreciate this three part statement. If nothing else it is a perfect lesson in how to use the semicolon, the most under appreciated of punctuation marks.
No, seriously, I like what he says here, because it puts into words something I've felt before. Living how the world expects you to live is relatively easy. If you know how to pick up basic social cues, it is easy enough act in ways that bring us into the protected fold of society. It is also easy, when isolated, to make thoughtful decisions about the kind of person you want to be. You can close your bedroom door and make your own personal mission statement and accompanying lists of values, virtues, and resolves (like Ben Franklin). But as soon as you take that list -- and those very individualistic notions -- out into the world, you start to feel the brute power of social expectation. Truly courageous people stand up to this tidal wave of expectation, dig their feet in mud, and insist upon their own visions of themselves. To use the language of the guy from this morning's assembly, courageous people are the ones who stand up. I'm not talking about rebellion per se, or even Rosa Parks type determination -- just the simple courage to be exactly the person you are or want to be. If you decide that most gossip is mean-spirited and hurtful, then have the courage to say something your caddy friends -- or even walk away. Sometimes, in order to be true to yourself, you have to say things that create the kind of awkwardness in conversations that everyone seems to want to avoid at all costs. Later in the piece, Emerson suggests that we should speak our words as "hard as cannonballs," the exact opposite advice given to us by our good friend Ben Franklin. Cannonballs, of course, can sink ships, but in the end to have enough moral nerve to stand by an unpopular viewpoint can bring the kind of "perfect sweetness" that he mentions. Sweet!
Oh ... and also: if you want to look ahead to the next couple of weeks, I put the new assignment sheet and the next three essay prompts on the website. On a scale of 1-10 with one being fast asleep and ten being ecstatic, how excited are you right now?
ReplyDeleteI think you just about said it all in terms of clarifying Emerson's point, so I'm going to assume you want us to affirm, deny, or qualify his point.
ReplyDeleteI do think Emerson's point is VERY valid, especially in a high school environment. High school is that time when everyone is trying to figure which clique they belong to, which table to sit at at lunch, and, how to essentially “find themselves.” This search can be dangerous, though. If someone cannot find themselves in the provided cliques, a common response is adaptation. This adaptation is the “easy way out” Emerson describes. Instead of manning up and embracing our individualism, insecure and temped by the easiness of conformity, students often adapt to their surroundings. Although adaptation leaves them seemingly comfortable publicly, the reality is often insecurity, uncertainty, and sometimes even shame.
I’m glad you brought up our speaker from last week. It has been my experience, in high school, that the response to those who are mentally and physically disabled is usually one of exclusion. It is my belief that the natural and individual response would be one of initial apprehension to the extreme uniqueness, followed by an easy acceptation. However, through conformity, the response remains at exclusion. The only time I have seen this exclusion cease is when a confident individual chooses to embrace acceptation. Then, as Emerson articulates, “a stranger will say with masterly good sense precisely what we have thought and felt all the time, and we shall be forced to take with shame our own opinion from another.”
Those students that reject conformity and are open to their own individual thoughts, may find that that student everyone has been collectively excluding is another Chad Hymas. So, as Emerson describes, although the road to individual thought is more difficult than conformity, it is my impression that it is all the more rewarding. It leaves little room for regret, “what if…?” moments, and missed opportunities.
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ReplyDeleteLike Aly I am going to defend Mr. Emerson's statement.
ReplyDeleteOne of the hardest things to do in today's society is to live by our own opinions and beliefs. It's funny how in America we have the freedom to be ourselves, do what we believe in, and be individuals, yet we manage to forget all that and become confined to just being like everybody else. All we seem to do is want to do is to fit in and this has become one of society's most important goals; even more important than money or success. Therefore, our "natural inclination" is to conform, despite our beliefs, to how the world wants things to be done or said because it is easier than being like the “great man” or woman that Emerson talks about. Being like "the great man" like Emerson talks about is extremely hard to do, in that, this rarely brings you popularity which is unattractive; most of the only time you only get laughs or funny looks.
The main reason why I agree with Emerson is because I see this war between the individual side and the side that makes me feel like the only thing that matters is that I fit in. For example, despite what some may think or assume, neither alcohol, “weed”, nor any other type of drugs have ever touched my lips or my body. When popped the question to try some of these things i’ve always been like the great man and have stood my ground like the “great man” and simply have said “no.” I feel that I have no need for these things to have fun or fit in; don’t even get me started on last year’s homecoming party bus. However, I still struggle with just doing that goes against my values as well. For example, I do not necessarily involve my self in gossip but when it comes to making fun of somebody, I always tend to join the group. Instead, I join in just so that i don’t make things awkward. This is something I want to work on because doing stuff based on our beliefs and opinions will get us a lot further in life than doing the opposite.
Overall, being yourself, I feel, will make you a lot better of a person and can in some cases can actually change others’ minds and start new trends.
I completely agree with Aly and Brian’s comments about Emerson’s writing and how it relates to high school life and morals. I also really like what Brian said about drinking and doing drugs, because it sometimes seems like it’s the only option to do what the group is doing, but it makes a much stronger statement not to follow the group but instead do what you know is right. The quote that I chose from this section is, “There is a time in every man’s education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance, that imitation is suicide, that he must take himself for better, for worse, as his portion.”
ReplyDeleteThis quote relates very well to what has already been discussed about being yourself and not just conforming to the norms of high school life. I chose this quote because I think it’s important to point out that Emerson believes that you have to make the best out of what you’ve been given in life if you want to succeed. At Parker, many students don’t appreciate all the things that we can learn here from teachers and other students, instead, we find ourselves complaining about the few things that are required of us as students. Another point Emerson makes is that there will always be people in life that are more successful, more athletic, or wealthier than you but you shouldn’t compare yourself to them or try to imitate their ways. Of course, this is totally applicable to high school. We can’t all have 4.8 GPA’s so it’s not even worth your time comparing yourself to those students. Although I don’t completely agree with Emerson that imitation is suicide, I do agree with his point that you should make your own decisions and be yourself without worrying about what others will think of you.
I agree with all of the students above (Ali, Brian and Jennie), but I cannot say that I completely agree with Emerson's "Self-Reliance".
ReplyDeleteHigh School is indeed a hard time for people to be their pure selves. It is hard to find someone on campus that isn't wearing vans, or texting on their iphone. The truth is, most teenagers are afraid to stand out in a crowd. Nobody wants to be the kid who looks strange and out of place because those kids are the ones who tend to get harassed or bullied.
Emerson point out that these habits of fitting in with the society have existed for thousands of years. He mentions Plato, Copernicus, and Moses as examples of non-conformists. What shocks me the most is the fact that these social trends remain alive to this day. I recently read an article in the New York Times about a young college kid named Dharun Ravi who commit suicide after his roommate posted videos on the internet of him having sexual intercourse with another man. Events like these, which occur way to often, are the result of constant pressure to conform. Like Dharun Ravi, teenagers feel a constant force pulling them towards the normal and forcing them to give up their true selves.
I completely agree with Emerson in that it takes incredible amounts of courage to look at society in the eyes and stand up for your beliefs. However, in order to develop these beliefs you must conform to your friends, teachers, and family to a certain extent. As teenagers, our opinions are heavily influenced by the people around us, and it is impossible to develop personal opinions without listening to those of others.
My favorite quote in "Self-Reliance" is "My life is not an apology, but a life." I chose this quote because it shows Emerson's confidence to his beliefs, and at the same time he scorns others for living apologetically towards society by conforming to it. Emerson also emphasizes that it is his life and he has complete control over it. He is not willing to let the people around him shape him or take control of his life in any way.
I completely agree with everyone above. Waldo does a very good job at portraying his thought on life as something that i believe everyone can relate to. It is true that in today's society, although people try their best to stick to their own opinions and beliefs, it appears as if people try harder to follow in someone else's footsteps in order to impress others.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Aly's comment about how in high school, it is seen how those with disabilities are more likely to be excluded and not befriended except i also believe that its not only those with disabilities. Today is has come down to whether you are "popular" or not. Just because you don't party on the weekends, do drugs, drink, or have a bunch of friends, doesn't qualify you as being weird or not normal. I dare you though to look around yourself at school and see if there is one or two people by themselves or someone talking about someone else because they arent "normal." Well to me that is being excluded to because those people who are just like every other student, are being treated differently.
My favorite quotes that Waldo states are, "What i must do, is all that concerns me, not what the people think" and "We are afraid of truth, afraid of fortune, afraid of death. and afraid of each other."
The first quote is really important to me because he is saying that who he is and what he does with his life is all the matters to him because even if someone else doesn't like it, it shouldn't matter. It shouldn't matter what anyone else perceives you as because its YOUR own life not theirs. I live by this quote everyday. If you live your life due to someone else's expectations, then how are you living your life?
The second quote is also very true to me. People might act as if nothing scares them, and that they have no care in the world, but in reality everyone is scared of every single one of those things. People lie because they are afraid of what the truth will bring forth. People are sometimes afraid of fortune because everyone knows what to much wealth can do to some. Every single human being is afraid of death. What if i die painfully? What if i die to early in my life? Well the truth is, you shouldnt be afraid because you will die when it is your destiny to leave. Lastly, we are all afraid of each other. Thats how rumors start, how people talk behind friends back, and how people resist the feeling of falling in love.
Well, the comment poster is saying that my "url is too long" So this is going to be a two parter.
ReplyDeletePART 1
For the sake of being an antagonist, and for seeing if I can completely create a false image of myself, state the following. I completely and utterly disagree with every single one of you, on the grounds that opinions regularly (perhaps constantly) create a person’s moral codes and standards, and those codes/standards create later opinions. While Gonzalo lightly touched on it, I want to expand this and see if I can turn it into a full-blown response.
Of course, these early opinions are created at infancy, when being taught by your parents. Some scientists call this stage the “Sponge Phase”, because, as the name implies, infants take in all information like a sponge, holding it in. Information in this sense can be anything from the alphabet to how the parents feel about something. Some of you may be thinking that the common, everyday infant would be completely unable to pick up on how its father completely abhors the ban on gay marriage for this and that reason; while the baby can’t catch exactly why the father doesn’t like it, a baby, like anyone else, can pick up on emotions and body language. There is the rare occurrence in which a father is completely monotone and statue-esque, even when discussing emotional issues, but that’s an anomaly, and I digress.
So what if a baby takes in everything and keeps it? Can’t a person just omit all the bad opinions? Possibly. The point of the argument is that a person’s basic morals are modeled after their parent’s, typically in the sense of what is right and wrong. Now of course there are outside influences (movies, television, friends, etc) but they’ll simply be implied with parents. Knowing that a person’s morals are based on other people’s morals, one can safely assume that there is absolutely no possible way that a person can live up to the quote.
PART 2
ReplyDeleteEven if they decide to ‘become independent’ they will merely be following a preset moral code they created from the mold of other people. While it may be slightly different on the issue of water pollution in Venezuela, there is always a source for every single moral code a person has. “Being an individual” can come from almost any person nowadays; it might have started with Benjamin Franklin, it might have started earlier than that, but the birth of the idea has little relevance to the argument about whether the idea is copied; and the answer is “yes, it is.”
On a slightly different note, many people actually shuffle ideas regularly, pulling out one in a fitting situation and then hiding that idea in another situation; and in some cases forget it completely. Take for example the idea that killing is wrong. If someone were to kill someone else, most people would say that would be a wrong thing to do. But what if the victim of said murder was an evil dictator? Then the murder not only is accepted but sought out by an entire country (see Saddam Hussein) But, this is a digression that I wanted to include for the sake of including it.
One could say that I’m following a preset moral code of “doing the different thing” by simply writing this essay. Some might say that most of you are writing yours to follow an idea put forward by your teacher, and you don’t want to fight against him. While this is (hopefully) entirely false, it is still a possibility. The point is that there really is no such thing as non-conformity, because whatever route is chosen, someone influenced you to take that course, whether it is a 19th century writer or a man in wheelchair, there is always someone helping you to ‘get out of your seat.’
Wow Matt! That was an eye opener for sure! I agree with your comments to an extent. It is almost always true that no one can completely choose the "path" that he/she follows in life. The person must follow a path. To create one's own path completely independent from outside influence is impossible. Every person looks up to someone, whether it is a relative, celebrity, or anyone else.
ReplyDeleteEveryone must have a role model, is it essential, but the real challenge is to not be a clone of that person. It is a necessity to learn from others to help create a moral (and otherwise) code. Even so, one's role model(s) should not completely shape his/her personality and goals. The purpose of a role model is to create a foundation, which must be built upon by the individual.
Each person by means of DNA is built differently or "special." Each person has the potential to be different. With a solid base, one may learn and think with "that gleam of light which flashes across his mind from within, more than the lustre of the firmament of bards and sages." Notice how this quote uses the word "more" as opposed to "instead of" or "rather than." This suggests that everyone must learn the basics from someone, but must live distinctively thereafter.
Pretty impressive everyone. As you may know, I stayed home from school today and wrote college letters, so right now I'm feeling pretty punchy. Reading all of your responses has left me even more light headed -- there are so many things to say. I wish I could respond to everybody, but here are a couple of quick thoughts:
ReplyDeleteAly -- good job getting everyone going. I think you might have misunderstood the assignment -- you were supposed to find your own quotation not respond to the one that I picked -- but you did a great job anyway. You set a wonderful tone ... which was picked up nicely by Brian the Educated Brother, who took the discussion in a slightly different direction, more toward peer pressure, drugs, and homecoming buses. Timely topic! Very interesting stuff and nice to have you aboard (the blog, not the bus). ... Jennie, it's great to hear your voice. You've got a lot to say... Yes, as Gonzalo says, it's hard to sign off on everything Emerson says. In small doses (the speckled axe theory) much of it is sensible and potentially enlightening; taken to its logical extreme it's an unlivable philosophy. If you followed him to the letter, you would be naked in a the woods playing the bongos... Nice job kicking it up a notch, Ashly. Emerson says that people who care the least about what others think are the greatest. But could they also be sociopaths? I get the point, though -- the less you care about what you imagine someone else might think, the more independent you are ... And, Matthew, you have some pretty fascinating things to say. Food for thought, to be sure. I like the fact that you aren't afraid to disagree... maybe Emerson would be proud. I find I disagree with much of what you're saying, though, mainly because it invalidates any real emotional response. To say that there is no such thing as nonconformity might be true at some level, but that can't discount independent thinking entirely. The postmodern notion that life is all just a series of cultural constructs invalidates the natural, and I just don't buy that. But I sure have enjoyed thinking about it.
Firstly, I would like to give major props to Matt for having the guts to disagree, and your statements do expose a whole new side of the argument
ReplyDeleteThis issue that Emerson presents is especially personal to me. For most of my life, I have always tried to do what was possible to look cool. I tried to be like my brother when I was seven or eight and listened to (what I now think of as) AWFUL music, such as Limp Bizkit and Korn, because I thought that's what the cool kids did. In fifth grade, I totally switched up my musical tastes and got into classic rock, because that's what Matt Daubner listened too and i wanted to be his best friend. In middle school, I just always tried to be cool, totally disregarding who I was. I wore clothes that, looking back, should have stayed on the rack at Macy's and I would say and do stupid things because that's what everyone else did. This even continued into freshman and most of sophomore year.
At the end of last year, through the summer, and for this entire year I've been re-examining myself. My best friend Lizz has been helping me hugely in the process by encouraging me to be myself. The reason I had hid it before is that, as many of you probably notice, I'm kind of a lot to take at once. But in recent month, I've begun living by the philosophy that "the ones who matter don't mind, and the ones who mind don't matter." In the process, I've become more accepting of myself, and to my delight, so have my close friends. I'm now not afraid to admit that I love Glee, musicals, and cashmere sweaters.
This self-acceptance has been nothing but simple. It has taken so much energy and willpower that I didn't even know I possessed, months upon months of thinking, and it probably never would have if i didn't have some of the best friends in the world. The process is still nowhere near complete, and there are still parts of myself that I hide because I'm afraid of how I would be judged by my peers, from who, even though I realize I will probably never talk to again after high school sans reunions, I still want acceptance. But as time passes and I become more comfortable with myself and with continued encouragement from my friends, I hope that before too long every one can finally meet the real me. Just a warning, I'm mildly insane.
And after writing this with the pink background blaring back at me, everything in my room looks green.
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ReplyDeleteMatt--
ReplyDeleteEven if a moral code is modeled completely by someone elses moral code, as long as you truly believe in that code and are honest to everyone around you, making it clear that you that you believe in that code, you've achieved self-reliance. Emerson isn't asking everyone to be original, he's asking everyone to, essentially, believe what they say/do and say/do what they believe.
Oh, and my favorite quote happened to be the same as Miss Ashly Brown," We are afraid of truth, afraid of fortune, afraid of death. and afraid of each other."
ReplyDeleteAs we all learned taking the PSAT, the human mind is incredible. It can do so much, process so much information, and yet it can cripple itself. Sometimes people are so afraid of the future that they forget to enjoy the present. We are all living in constant fear that something will go so wrong in our lives, and sometimes were forget to enjoy the present. School, sadly, is a perfect example. Sometimes we are so concerned with just learning facts and emptying them on a test that we miss what the message of the lesson actually is. We get so caught up in our fear of getting bad grades that we forget to actually sit back and analyze what our (amazing, fantastic, and enlightened) teachers are trying to teach. Another example of this type of behavior is rather personal. I went to a party a while ago, and I was so afraid that people would think I was weird that I forgot to actually have fun. It's one of those things that a lot of people do, and are able to recognize, but time and time again they keep on being afraid of what the future has in store, the truth, and each other, and forget to actually LIVE.
I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to post a comment that is very eloquent, considering that I'm running on four hours of sleep... Regardless, I want to just say that I enjoyed reading everyone's assessments of Emerson's argument. I completely agree that, in high school and in life, people tend to try to imitate others and conform to society's norms in order to fit in. Whether this is an instinctual survival technique or simply a means to be more well-liked, the drive of Parker students to fit in is immense. Rather than being individuals, people at Parker try to fit in in every way, from clothes to music to friends to behavior to activities. The pressure to be a perfect Parker student isn't just academic- there is also an immense pressure to look and act "cool". This has been something that has frustrated me for as long as I can remember. Just because I would rather hang out with my friends at home on a Friday night than go to a house party or out drinking, I'm often labeled as "innocent" or "lame". Because teenagers try so hard to fit in, they reject what they truly want and want to be doing, and do mainly what is considered to be cool.
ReplyDeleteThe quote I chose is"Nature is not slow to equip us in the prison-uniform of the party to which we adhere." This quote from Self-Reliance sums up my feelings about high school and conformity. It traps teens into acting a certain way and being unable to express their true selves. The struggle to be an individual is hard, but why should you try to fit in to a certain social standard? Why should who you are not be good enough?
This response reminded me of a quote I've heard before: "It is better to be the best version of yourself than a lesser version of someone else." This quote is important to me because it reinforces my belief that being the best person I can be is all I can do. Being "cool" is not something that interests me. "Coolness" is relative, but respectfulness, friendliness, integrity, and responsibility are not. By being the best person I can be morally, I can fit in anywhere, no matter what is considered to be cool. Though it is often hard, like Gonzalo said, to step out of the norms of society and emerge as an individual, the true beauty of a society is the unique personalities, people, and ideas that shape it. In order for it to be varied, the people within it cannot be afraid to let their true selves emerge.
Oh, and sorry Mr. H. My favorite quote, which I felt broadly summed up the whole essay was, "Trust thyself." Simple as that.
ReplyDeleteIt says recognize the validity of your thoughts, don't dismiss "that gleam of light which flashes across" your mind, say what you want to say, do what you want to do, try it...just truth thyself.
Can I bring up another question? Who decides what is the norm? Who decides what is cool? Isnt it essentially YOU who decides what to conform to? Is it YOU who has the power to be influenced or not by society, or are you influenced whether you like it or not? For example, the "popular" people at a school. Is it them who decide that they are cool and that people should respect and copy them, or is their reveredness a result of society's praise?
ReplyDeleteI've always wondered this- what makes someone (or something) popular or cool.
Jose: “Mom, can I please wear my brand new Heelies that have extra velcro…all of my friends are!”
ReplyDeleteMom: “Josey, if all of your friends decided to go and jump off a cliff, would you do it to!”
Just a few days ago, excuse me, a few years ago, I had this exact conversation with my mother just before leaving to school. It seems as though every time I “change my ways” to fit in, she lectures me on how I am special and cool no matter what! After reading “Self-reliance,” I realized that I agree with Emerson’s point and argument, which is very similar to that of my mothers.
Like Emily commented, I agree that people go way out of their way to try and become something that they aren’t. Whether its pure pressure or envy, instead of being individuals, often people will do whatever it takes to be normal and blend in with the crowd. For example, when high school students are taking tests and see other classmates glancing on another’s paper, nobody wants to be that kid known as the “taddle-tailer” who gets everybody in trouble. I’m not saying that every student is like this. However, a majority of them will prevent from stepping up and doing what they feel is morally right. "Insist on yourself; never imitate. Your own gift you can present every moment with the cumulative force of a whole life's cultivation; but of the adopted talent of another, you have only an extemporaneous, half possession." This quote truly interested me because of the message that Emerson was trying to tell the reader when writing this section. Every one is different in a unique and different way. Every one has a talent that was given to them for a purpose, to use at it’s maximum potential. By trying to emulate others, many people become corrupt and lose a sense of who they are as a person and what kind of life are they trying to live. Although the idea of being an individual is being stressed, having role-models is always helpful. Yet, the most important and crucial part is picking these influences and being able to cut off any outside intruders that are knocking at your door.